examples of college essays

They were written by high school students and submitted as part of a successful application at some of the leading colleges and universities in the United States. This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. You can also learn more about our 1-on-1 college admissions support here. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. What is in the wrong place? As you go through the essays we've compiled for you above, ask yourself the following questions: Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it. The Sonora Eagles were my means for dealing with the death of my loved ones to cancer. One great way to get started is to read examples of successful essays. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control. When I was thirteen and visiting Liberia, I contracted what turned out to be yellow fever. Use interesting descriptions, stay away from clichés, include your own offbeat observations—anything that makes this essay sounds like you and not like anyone else. We were told to figure out what had happened with no phones or textbooks, just our brains. By using a person’s genome to tailor a treatment for them or using someone’s personal smartphone as a mobile-monitor to remotely diagnose symptoms, everyday technology is harnessed to make significant strides forward. Why does it captivate you? Some of the experiences in these essays are one-of-a-kind. I’ve learned how to encourage my peers to meet deadlines, to work around 30 different schedules at once, and to give presentations convincing people why my organization is worth their donation. My branch has helped raise almost $3,000 to build water sanitation plants, construct medical clinics, and develop health education programs in the small village of Zwedru. They are like cliffhangers, setting up an exciting scene or an unusual situation with an unclear conclusion, in order to make the reader want to know more. One way to understand what colleges are looking for when they ask you to write an essay is to check out the essays of students who already got in—college essays that actually worked. I have found that the search for the holy grail of a “cure for cancer” is problematic as nobody knows exactly what it is or where to look—but we can still move forward without it. When you’re asked to write a cause and effect essay, you need to first understand its basic structure and purpose. Or do they? My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. Steve Jobs inspired me, when in his commencement address to Stanford University in 2005, he said "Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Using this collected data, it was possible to determine if the curcumin and/or the nanoparticles had played any significant role on the cervical cancer cells. The Hotchkiss volunteers had already left, off to enjoy some Texas BBQ, leaving me behind with the college kids to clean up. Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application, some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay, and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities. I would assign people, aptly named Fixer-Uppers, to fix everything that needed fixing. Coat hangers: not just for crows' nests anymore! As much as I would enjoy it, I now accept that I won't become Emperor of the World, and that the Fixer-Uppers will have to remain in my car ride imaginings. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I was lucky enough to discover what I am passionate about when I was a freshman in high school. We study information to regurgitate it on a test and forget it the following day. addict, I volunteered to help out with the Adapted PE class. We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Instead, I chose to do advanced molecular biology research at Stanford University. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. I wanted to become a board-certified behavior analyst. Clear a hole!" 12 College Admission Essays That Worked 2 Introduction This document is a collection of college admissions essays that worked. It is a profession founded solely on skill and technique–or so I thought. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. What's extra? The exploration led me to the African Disease Prevention Project (ADPP), a non-profit organization associated with several universities. (Götz/Wikimedia). The phenomenon of interdependency, man depending on man for survival, has shaped centuries of human civilization. At the Summer Research Program, I found out how much I enjoy thinking critically, solving problems, and applying my knowledge to the real world. The most important moment occurred during the night’s luminaria ceremony, during which cancer patients of the past and present were commemorated. Here is a collection of essays that are college-specific. I hadn't had too much interaction with special needs students before, and wasn't sure how to handle myself around them. Someone picked a coat hanger out of the dumpster, handed it to me, and took a few steps back. I hadn't had too much interaction with special needs students before, and wasn't sure how to handle myself around them. If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. I attended the SPK Program, a five-week enrichment program with New Jersey’s best and brightest students. CLICK HERE TO SCHEDULE A COMPLIMENTARY 30-MINUTE CONSULTATION TO LEARN HOW WE CAN HELP THEM GET INTO THEIR DREAM SCHOOLS. Through this experience as a leader, I have come to realize, as a community, we hope together, we dream together, we work together, and we succeed together. This one shows a panoramic view of the city of Santa Barbara, California. Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan, Leslie Jamison, Hanif Abdurraqib, and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more example of how to craft a compelling personal narrative. (Note: Learn about how to get into Harvard undergrad). Describe the issue in your life. Let's find out why! She is passionate about improving student access to higher education. THERE'S NO REASON TO STRUGGLE THROUGH THE COLLEGE ADMISSIONS PROCESS ALONE, ESPECIALLY WITH SO MUCH ON THE LINE. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. While I sat in the car and watched the miles pass by, I developed the plan for my empire. As a student of the University of California, I will contribute my understanding of the human condition and student motivation to help strengthen student relationships within the campus and throughout the community. A miniature Flamenco dancer stares back at me from the confines of the 3-D rectangular magnet, half popping out as if willing herself to come to life. This grisly experience exposed an entirely different side of this profession I hope to pursue. A Comprehensive Guide. The boy who accidentally tossed his Frisbee onto the roof of the school would get it back. Bridget's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. There's been an oil spill!" This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant. A BCBA helps develop learning plans for students with autism and other disabilities. Back in his office, Dr. Q addressed my obvious state of contemplation: “This is the hardest part about what we do as surgeons,” he said, sincerely. For more editing tips, check out a style guide like Dreyer's English or Eats, Shoots & Leaves. So, I will forgive and forget, love and inspire, experience and satire, laugh and cry, accomplish and fail, live and die. A killer first sentence. Suddenly, everything fell into place for me. At first, it will give you the much needed confidence to write your own thing without fear that you might do something wrong and inappropriate and you won’t be able to … This is the phenomenon of interdependency, the interconnectedness of life, the pivotal reason for human existence. I always pictured a Fixer-Upper as a smiling man in an orange T-Shirt. I believe that humans will always have the ability to rise above any situation, because life is what you make of it. The author starts with a very detailed story of an event or description of a person or place. Don't take my word for it—check out these 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants and tell me you don't want to read the rest of those essays to find out what happens! And often, it's chaos. I believe that humans will always have the ability to rise above any situation, because life is what you make of it. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. (JD Hancock/Flickr). A self-admitted Phys. However, at key moments, Bridget emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences. What SAT Target Score Should You Be Aiming For? And the effect doesn’t stop there—by improving one area, our efforts permeate into neighboring villages as they mimic the lifestyle changes that they observe nearby—simple things, like making soap available—can have a big effect. Stephen's first example (breaking into the van in Laredo) is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. "Can you do that thing with a coat hanger to unlock it?". Excellent “Why This College?” Examples. We'll learn your background and interests, brainstorm essay topics, and walk you through the essay drafting process, step-by-step. We combine world-class admissions counselors with our data-driven, proprietary admissions strategies. There are different famous education institutes that require students to write essays on their given format. Every day I want to live. Using flow cytometry to excite each individually suspended cell with a laser, the scattered light from the cells helped to determine which cells were living, had died from apoptosis or had died from necrosis. "Unpredictability and chaos" are very abstract, not easily visualized concepts. But this past summer, I realized I was wrong. Apply them to your writing to drastically improve your chances of being admitted to a coveted college. In this article, I'll go through general guidelines for what makes great college essays great. College application essays are important in college admission because an examiner can judge a lot about the student by a simple glance on their essay. Don't leave your college application to chance. This essay uses many techniques that make Bridget sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know her. SAT® is a registered trademark of the College Entrance Examination BoardTM. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence. Discovering that surgery is also a moral vocation beyond the generic application of a trained skill set encouraged me. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. These are some admissions essays that our officers thought were most successful! Great first sentences are punchy. However, a simple tale helped me deal with these deaths and take action. 50 Successful Ivy League Application Essays and 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays by Gen and Kelly Tanabe—For essays from other top schools, check out this venerated series, which is regularly updated with new essays. He laughed and told me that it was a nice change that a seventeen-year-old knew so specifically what she wanted to do. The essay is arranged chronologically. To be honest, I was really nervous. “I trust you, Doc. Emma Stout '23 Houston, TX. While my research didn’t yield definitive results for the effects of curcumin on cervical cancer cells, my research on curcumin-functionalized CoFe2O4/TiO2 core-shell nanoconjugates indicated that there were many unknown factors affecting the HeLa cells, and spurred the lab to expand their research into determining whether or not the timing of the drug delivery mattered and whether or not the position of the binding site of the drugs would alter the results. BS/MD | BA/MD | BS/DO Admissions Services, Graduate / Law / Business / Dental / Pharmacy School Admissions Services, Successful College Essay Examples From Top-25 Universities, please let us know how we can help you crack the the college admissions code, IS YOUR CHILD STRUGGLING TO WRITE AMAZING COLLEGE ESSAYS? Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these. I wanted to immerse myself in my passion for biology and dip into the infinitely rich possibilities of my mind. My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. Long story short, I got hooked. I decided to create the first high school branch of the organization; I liked its unique way of approaching health and social issues. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. Every childhood Fixer-Upper ever. Instead, I chose to do molecular biology research at Stanford University. But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?". Technique #1: humor. I want to make mistakes, because that is how I learn; I want to follow the beat of my own drum even if it is "out of tune." Please note that some of these college essay examples may … We hope these essays inspire you as you write your own personal statement. I don't sweat the small stuff, and I definitely don't expect perfect fairness. I could have easily chosen to spend that summer the traditional way; in fact, my parents even tried to persuade me into taking a break. If this kind of exactness is not your strong suit, you're in luck! This is a college essay that worked for Duke University. Bridget the Fixer-Upper will be slightly different than the imaginary one who paints houses and fetches Frisbees. Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. I was never fully aware of how closely humans rely upon each other until I read The Fall of Freddy the Leaf by Leo Buscaglia in freshman year. Learn more about PrepScholar Admissions to maximize your chance of getting in. Maybe it could be me. It can be an intellectual challenge, a research query, an ethical dilemma—anything that is of personal importance, no matter the scale. Last year, I joined the American Cancer Society‘s Relay for Life, a twenty-four-hour relay walk-a-thon designed to raise funds for cancer research and create awareness about its early detection. The essay begins and ends with Bridget's enjoying a car ride, but this doesn't seem to be related either to the Fixer-Upper idea or to her passion for working with special-needs students. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The 5 Strategies You Must Be Using to Improve 160+ SAT Points, How to Get a Perfect 1600, by a Perfect Scorer, Free Complete Official SAT Practice Tests. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?3. Maybe instead, a Fixer-Upper could be a tall girl with a deep love for Yankee Candles. So, maybe I'll be like Sue Storm and her alter-ego, the Invisible Woman. "The water's on fire! By default, life is difficult because we must strive to earn happiness and success. What prompted your thinking? I will not waste time for my life is already in flux. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The College Entrance Examination BoardTM does not endorse, nor is it affiliated in any way with the owner or any content of this site. Ask below and we'll reply! You'll see a similar structure in many of the essays. "Then I want our best elementary school students on it, STAT. The college has asked for a short essay because it has holistic admissions; in other words, the school tries to evaluate the whole applicant through both quantitative. As you make your way through middle school, high school, and college, your instructors will assign a number of different essays for you to write. What is she hoping to bring to the lives of her future clients? From growing HeLa cells to trying to kill them with different compounds, I was able to gain the hands-on experience necessary for me to realize once again why I love science. Technique #2: invented terminology. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. With links to 140 full essays and essay excerpts, this article will be a great resource for learning how to craft your own personal college admissions essay! 140 College Essay Examples for 11 Schools + Expert Analysis, Get Free Guides to Boost Your SAT/ACT Score, 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants, Find out more about PrepScholar Admissions now, 14 Common Application essays from the classes of 2019-2022, 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2022, 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2018, 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2012, 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2007, 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2023, 7 Common Application of Universal Application essays from the class of 2022, 5 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2021, 7 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2020, 8 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2019, 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2018, 3 essays (and 1 video response) on "Why Babson" from the class of 2020, 6 "best gift" essays from the class of 2018, Tufts asks applicants to answer two short essay questions, 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays, detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application, suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay, writing about your extracurricular activities, what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying, Paragraph 1: "after a long day in first grade", Paragraph 4: "when I was a freshman in high school", Can you explain to yourself (or someone else!)

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